Q: Why did God make snakes before lawyers?
A: For practice.
Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.
Q: Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy.
Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving.
Q: What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
A: Not enough sand.
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